


The wreckage left behind will somehow make me grow

by Kroolea



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars: The Clone Wars (2008) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Family, Friendship, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Jesse is a good bro, Kix is a mom what else is new, Rex doesnt understand the force but thats okay, The clones are ahsoka's ori'vod, a little dramatic but good, aftermath of Zygerria, ahsoka loves her bros, they love their little sister
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-02
Updated: 2020-04-02
Packaged: 2021-03-01 05:00:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,483
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23439571
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kroolea/pseuds/Kroolea
Summary: Ahsoka can't sleep. Too many nightmares. Too many bad memories. Luckily she has a hoard of brother's willing to protect her.(Sequel to Is This What Being Vulnerable Feels Like but can be read independently.)
Relationships: Anakin Skywalker & Ahsoka Tano, CT-7567 | Rex & Ahsoka Tano, Obi-Wan Kenobi & Ahsoka Tano
Comments: 3
Kudos: 152





	The wreckage left behind will somehow make me grow

Ahsoka glared at the dummy in front of her. It was nothing fancy, just an old training dummy that one of the clones had found. It worked great for letting out frustration though so Ahsoka wasn't complaining.

She let out an angry cry and attacked it with her fists. It swung listlessly as she punched it harder and harder. Tears welled in her eyes but she kept on. She didn't here the door open nor did she hear Rex call for her softly.

"Commander? Commander Tano? Ahsoka!"

She swung around, startled and nearly punched him square in the jaw. He grabbed her hand and gently put it down. She stared at him in shock and horror.

"Captain Rex." She said, breathlessly. She turned from him and faced the wall, unable to look him in the eye.

"General Skywalker said we would be landing on Coruscant in exactly one rotation. He also said to tell you to make sure you go to Kix for any injuries."

"Like he's the one to talk. Has he gone to see Kix?" She asked dryly. Rex laughed slightly.

"Probably not, sir. Are you doing alright?" His voice softened slightly. She gave him a small smile and began gathering her things.

"Yes. Thank you."

"I at least deserve to know why I was almost socked in the jaw."

Ahsoka winced. "Sorry about that." She rubbed the back of her neck awkwardly. "I'm just not doing so great after the whole being a slave thing."

Rex frowned. He never liked that plan, he thought it was risky and despite her ability to handle herself, Ahsoka was still a child.

"Did they hurt you?" He asked gently. She scoffed.

"Of course." She muttered. She finished gathering her things and had put her lightsabers on her belt when he stopped her.

"How badly?" He moved his hand back quickly when he saw her flinch.

"I- not as badly as you or Obi-Wan. It's not a big deal." She shrugged, Rex watched her carefully.

"Ahsoka, you're my _vod_." He said, she smiled slightly at that. "If you're hurt, I want to know. Especially if those scum hurt you."

"It's really nothing, I'm sorry for nearly punching you. I need some time alone." He nodded.

"Of course commander." He nodded. "Of you ever need to talk, I'm sure any of us clones would be glad to listen."

"Thank you," she hesitated " _vod_."

He gave her a salute and walked away.

\--

Ahsoka couldn't sleep. She hadn't been able to since Zygerria. Every time she closed her eyes she saw their faces, felt them touching her, heard them floating about the Jedi whelp that had failed.

Instead she decided to roam the ship. Not many were up and the few that were paid little attention to the padawan.

Somehow she ended up near the barracks. She froze, under the door she could see that the lights were still on. She went to open the door and faltered. They could be asleep with the lights on. She didn't want to be the one to wake up exhausted clones.

She stifled a yawn. It was no good, she would just go to bed and face the nightmares by herself. She couldn't fully convince herself to go back to her room so she opened the door to the barracks. Four sets of brown eyes stared at her before Rex finally spoke. He stood, ready to follow her orders.

"Commander Tano." He said, his eyes softened as he took in her disheveled appearance.

"Rex." Before her brain comprehended what was happening she had thrown herself into the captain's arms. Tears filled her eyes.

"Ahsoka?" She realized the three other clones were watching her. "Is something wrong?" He asked. Ahsoka shook her head.

"I can't sleep, I keep seeing them. Keep hearing them. I want them to stop." She trembled. Rex held on to her tightly.

"What happened on Zygerria, Ahsoka?" He asked, he guided her to one of the empty bunks and let her sit down.

Kix stood up from where he was sitting and sat beside her. Jesse and Fives watched and listened from their bunks.

"I c-can't... I don't want to-" Ahsoka hiccuped. Kix gently took her hands, she didn't flinch away.

"Sometimes talking it out is the best way. It's like getting glass out of a cut. It hurts for little but them it starts to heal." He told her.

Fives rolled his eyes. "That's a beautiful analogy." He deadpanned. Ahsoka laughed wetly, wiping her tears.

"They... The Zygerrians, well... there was one Zygerrian that was in charge- in charge of me. The queen told him that after things had settled down... That he could have me. A-and so he and a couple others." She paused to take a shaky breath. "They just started talking, saying I was too rowdy. That they could... tame me." She shuddered. Kix and Rex exchanged a look.

"Take it slow, 'Soka. It's okay, don't rush through this if you need time to think." Jesse soothed. She flashed him a thankful glance.

"They r-..." She sighed and stared at her fingers. "They raped me."

There was a heavy silence in the room. After a few minutes Fives spoke.

" _Osik_ , Ahsoka. I'm so sorry."

Rex was staring at a wall. Not their _vod'ika_ , their little sister.

"I wish I could've killed him. I would've done it in a heartbeat." Rex said, she gave him wry smile.

"I think Anakin beat you to it. He didn't even know." She attempted to joke. Rex nodded.

"Have you told anyone else?" Kix asked. Ahsoka nodded.

"I told Master Plo. That's it, I didn't want to bother Obi-Wan and Anakin. And don't worry, I'm going to see a healer when we get to Coruscant." She explained. Kix nodded, somewhat relieved.

"General Kenobi and General Skywalker won't be bothered. If you don't want to tell them, I understand. But if you're worried about being a bother, don't. They view you like a _vod'ika_." Jesse cut in. "It's sad Anakin killed that guy, I would love to show him what happens when you mess with our _aliit_."

The others nodded in agreement. Ahsoka rubbed her eyes as she felt tears burning them again. "You guys are the best." She choked out.

Rex nodded. "Of course. Do you need us to do anything? I can walk you back to your quarters." He offered and she nodded. She couldn't stay here all night. Soon the others would come to sleep and she didn't want to keep them up. Besides she also needed to sleep.

Rex got up, she followed, standing beside him. "Rex...?"

"Yes?"

"Can you come with me... I want to tell Anakin and Obi-Wan." She faltered. He put a gentle hand on her shoulder. She shifted away and he quickly put his hand down at his side.

"You don't have to... No one's forcing you to." He reassured. She twisted her fingers, a nervous habit she had."

"I know. They're going to know something is up."

"Ah, the Force?"

"Yeah, the Force." She answered, he nodded as she switched directions toward the General's quarters."

She knocked on the door to the room timidly. Rex guessed she could sense them in it or something... Force stuff.

It opened after a moment. Obi-Wan had opened it but Anakin was close behind.

"What's wrong, Snips?" He asked. Rex didn't even need the Force to feel how anxious Ahsoka was.

"I- it's about Zygerria." She said calmly. Anakin and Obi-Wan exchanged a glance but let Rex and Ahsoka into the small, somewhat empty room.

Ahsoka told them what had happened. Rex watched, guilt crossed Obi-Wan's face but his face soon settled back into it's usual calm position. A mixture of fury and pain etched it's way onto Anakin's face. It stayed there even after she finished her story.

Obi-Wan found his voice first. He gave her a bittersweet smile. "You're so strong, Ahsoka. I'm proud to have you as my grand padawan. Many people wouldn't be able to "

Anakin's eyes were suspiciously watery, not that Rex would say anything about it. "Snips... I'm so sorry. It never occured to me that... I never thought they would..." He trailed off. Ahsoka hugged him.

"It wasn't your fault." Ahsoka suddenly realized Rex was watching them, somewhat awkwardly. "Oh, Rex, you can go back to bed. Tell the others I'm sorry for-"

"Nothing to be sorry about, commander. Good night, _nuhoy jahaala, ad'ika_."

"I'm not little..." Ahsoka protested tiredly as Rex walked away..

Rex took a moment to gather himself before heading back to the barracks. Ahsoka would be fine. She was strong, one of the strongest people he knew. With Obi-Wan and Anakin as her mentors. Not to mention Senator Amidala and whoever else had taken the teenager under their wings.

Yes, she would be fine, he decided before heading to his bunk to sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> Mando'a translations:
> 
> Ori'vod- big brother/sister 
> 
> Vod- Brother/sister (basically just sibling)
> 
> Vod'ika- little brother/sister
> 
> Osik- shit
> 
> Aliit- Family/clan
> 
> Nuhoy jahaala, ad'ika- Sleep well, little one
> 
> Random authors note: Over this quarantine I've slowly been picking up Mando'a from all the fanfics I've been reading XD anyways I hope you enjoyed. Please comment, comments always make my day 1000 times better :)


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